#430706
(Note: I have not seen Solo, nor am I sure that I want to see it, so for the sake of fairness, I will leave it out of this list.)
1. The Empire Strikes Back: I know, such a bold controversial choice. This does what a great sequel should do: Tell a great story that doesn't just copy the first but really delves into our characters now that we don't have to spend time exploring how they got here. Also it's pretty bold in that it means its title. The characters don't win by any stretch of the imagination, they just survive. But still, we leave off with hope. Also, points for arguably the biggest reveal ever in pre-Internet cinema.
2. A New Hope (aka the first movie): On its own, this movie is almost a fairy tale. The characters basically come from nothing (except Leia) and deal a devastating blow to this Galactic Empire out of nowhere. The rest of the franchise doesn't exist without this coming together so perfectly.
3. Rogue One: Here's my first controversy, but I thought this movie was great. Like Empire, it basically makes clear that one does not fight a Galactic Empire because they think they can WIN, but because they must even if it's ultimately suicidal (and perhaps even moreso than in Empire.) Alan Tudyk's portrayal of K-2SO was just plain perfect, but there was a lot to like besides that.
Though I will say that in an effort to explain a "plot hole" that was just fine before, this movie made it worse. So having the exhaust port WAS an avoidable error? And no one caught it? I presume the "analysis" mentioned in the first movie was Galen Erso just TELLING them about the port, otherwise it makes it even sillier.
Also, this widened another plot hole. Does a galaxy far, far away have data transmission? The scene in Empire where the Emperor contacted Vader (aka the scene no one minded being changed for the Special Editions) implies that they do, but if so, why not transmit the plans to the entire galaxy and thus leave no clue where the Rebels ultimately receiving them are? Except that that kills the whole franchise.
Also, the CGI characters couldn't quite get out of the Uncanny Valley and that was a little distracting.
4. Return of the Jedi: I was actually torn on whether to rank it above Revenge of the Sith or not, but on further contemplation, I just couldn't. Maybe I'm the sci fi fan equivalent of a homer, but the original cast is the best cast. It might have ranked higher without all the Ewok nonsense (that I still eventually blame for Jar Jar), but it was definitely a satisfying wrap up to the story had we never received anything else outside of the original Expanded Universe.
5. Revenge of the Sith: Most would agree that this is best of the prequel films, though that isn't saying much. The Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman stuff isn't anywhere near as bad as it was last time, but there are still some head scratching moments there. But I did like the opening space battle stuff, and Ian McDiarmid is great as the Emperor. I did feel that the movie continued a lot longer than it needed to just to wrap up all the loose ends to go into the classic trilogy.
6. The Force Awakens: There was a lot to like here, but it was ultimately hurt by how much they grabbed A New Hope in a bear hug and never let go. It was only slightly better than what Star Trek Into Darkness did to Wrath of Khan. I was intrigued by all the story lines set up, but...
7. The Last Jedi: ....Rian Johnson happened. I could go into a whole diatribe, but it's mostly all of the story lines Abrams set up being basically answered by "Eh, it doesn't matter" and the betrayal of Luke's character (a great video I watched basically made a premise that the "New Hope" in A New Hope was Luke, and that hope was the entire basis of his character. Also, between the two movies, it really sucked that we didn't (and never will) get a shot of Luke, Leia and Han all simultaneously on screen ever again.
I've heard the theory floating around that the studio was considering apologizing, officially de-canonizing it and remaking it from scratch with a whole new story, and frankly that wouldn't be a bad idea.
8. Attack of the Clones: These two are the dregs and AotC basically gets the benefit of being less awful than TPM. Anakin's and Padme's awful romance is at its nadir here (And once we start our Star Wars conspiracy thread, we can put in that perhaps Anakin was, consciously or not, influencing Padme to fall in "love" with him and that's why that happened despite the awkwardness. And that makes the entire franchise kind of icky.) Lucas didn't get the idea quite yet that no one liked Jar Jar (as opposed to RotS only having a 2 second non-speaking cameo for the guy) and had him be the one responsible for giving Palpatine emergency power. Some nice bits, but not enough to save anything.
9. The Phantom Menace: And we're back to total non-controversy. To be fair, there was so much hype for this that there was no way this was going to be well received. But the plot relied on everyone accepting a lot of backstory and that there was political maneuvering going on. Jar Jar was incredibly stupid. I get the complaints of those who say he came off as racist, but I felt Watto and the Trade Federation were much more problematic there.
There were massive plot holes, like how Quigon and Obi-Wan rode to the surface in Trade Federation vehicles landing invasion troops, but had to ultimately go through the planet's (apparently completely inactive) core to reach the city where the Queen was, so why were invasion forces being landed so far away? Also Quigon's decision making regarding obtaining the parts that were needed left some head scratching too. Even if Watto was immune to Jedi mind tricks, he could certainly find someone who wasn't who would take the Republic Credits in exchange for local currency. And how could he think leaving Shmi there was a good idea? And why the virgin birth? Argh.
Add to this the pod racing scene that came off as a commercial for the admittedly very good game, Jake Lloyd NOT being up to a challenge like this role (or having good material to work from) and having four separate plots going at the end (Jar Jar and the Gungans fighting Droids, Padme and her group trying to capture the Trade Federation's chancellor, Quigon and Obi-Wan fighting Darth Maul and Anakin and the Naboo pilots fighting the Droid Control Ship and it was a mess)
These are my beliefs, and as such are beyond contestation!
1. The Empire Strikes Back: I know, such a bold controversial choice. This does what a great sequel should do: Tell a great story that doesn't just copy the first but really delves into our characters now that we don't have to spend time exploring how they got here. Also it's pretty bold in that it means its title. The characters don't win by any stretch of the imagination, they just survive. But still, we leave off with hope. Also, points for arguably the biggest reveal ever in pre-Internet cinema.
2. A New Hope (aka the first movie): On its own, this movie is almost a fairy tale. The characters basically come from nothing (except Leia) and deal a devastating blow to this Galactic Empire out of nowhere. The rest of the franchise doesn't exist without this coming together so perfectly.
3. Rogue One: Here's my first controversy, but I thought this movie was great. Like Empire, it basically makes clear that one does not fight a Galactic Empire because they think they can WIN, but because they must even if it's ultimately suicidal (and perhaps even moreso than in Empire.) Alan Tudyk's portrayal of K-2SO was just plain perfect, but there was a lot to like besides that.
Though I will say that in an effort to explain a "plot hole" that was just fine before, this movie made it worse. So having the exhaust port WAS an avoidable error? And no one caught it? I presume the "analysis" mentioned in the first movie was Galen Erso just TELLING them about the port, otherwise it makes it even sillier.
Also, this widened another plot hole. Does a galaxy far, far away have data transmission? The scene in Empire where the Emperor contacted Vader (aka the scene no one minded being changed for the Special Editions) implies that they do, but if so, why not transmit the plans to the entire galaxy and thus leave no clue where the Rebels ultimately receiving them are? Except that that kills the whole franchise.
Also, the CGI characters couldn't quite get out of the Uncanny Valley and that was a little distracting.
4. Return of the Jedi: I was actually torn on whether to rank it above Revenge of the Sith or not, but on further contemplation, I just couldn't. Maybe I'm the sci fi fan equivalent of a homer, but the original cast is the best cast. It might have ranked higher without all the Ewok nonsense (that I still eventually blame for Jar Jar), but it was definitely a satisfying wrap up to the story had we never received anything else outside of the original Expanded Universe.
5. Revenge of the Sith: Most would agree that this is best of the prequel films, though that isn't saying much. The Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman stuff isn't anywhere near as bad as it was last time, but there are still some head scratching moments there. But I did like the opening space battle stuff, and Ian McDiarmid is great as the Emperor. I did feel that the movie continued a lot longer than it needed to just to wrap up all the loose ends to go into the classic trilogy.
6. The Force Awakens: There was a lot to like here, but it was ultimately hurt by how much they grabbed A New Hope in a bear hug and never let go. It was only slightly better than what Star Trek Into Darkness did to Wrath of Khan. I was intrigued by all the story lines set up, but...
7. The Last Jedi: ....Rian Johnson happened. I could go into a whole diatribe, but it's mostly all of the story lines Abrams set up being basically answered by "Eh, it doesn't matter" and the betrayal of Luke's character (a great video I watched basically made a premise that the "New Hope" in A New Hope was Luke, and that hope was the entire basis of his character. Also, between the two movies, it really sucked that we didn't (and never will) get a shot of Luke, Leia and Han all simultaneously on screen ever again.
I've heard the theory floating around that the studio was considering apologizing, officially de-canonizing it and remaking it from scratch with a whole new story, and frankly that wouldn't be a bad idea.
8. Attack of the Clones: These two are the dregs and AotC basically gets the benefit of being less awful than TPM. Anakin's and Padme's awful romance is at its nadir here (And once we start our Star Wars conspiracy thread, we can put in that perhaps Anakin was, consciously or not, influencing Padme to fall in "love" with him and that's why that happened despite the awkwardness. And that makes the entire franchise kind of icky.) Lucas didn't get the idea quite yet that no one liked Jar Jar (as opposed to RotS only having a 2 second non-speaking cameo for the guy) and had him be the one responsible for giving Palpatine emergency power. Some nice bits, but not enough to save anything.
9. The Phantom Menace: And we're back to total non-controversy. To be fair, there was so much hype for this that there was no way this was going to be well received. But the plot relied on everyone accepting a lot of backstory and that there was political maneuvering going on. Jar Jar was incredibly stupid. I get the complaints of those who say he came off as racist, but I felt Watto and the Trade Federation were much more problematic there.
There were massive plot holes, like how Quigon and Obi-Wan rode to the surface in Trade Federation vehicles landing invasion troops, but had to ultimately go through the planet's (apparently completely inactive) core to reach the city where the Queen was, so why were invasion forces being landed so far away? Also Quigon's decision making regarding obtaining the parts that were needed left some head scratching too. Even if Watto was immune to Jedi mind tricks, he could certainly find someone who wasn't who would take the Republic Credits in exchange for local currency. And how could he think leaving Shmi there was a good idea? And why the virgin birth? Argh.
Add to this the pod racing scene that came off as a commercial for the admittedly very good game, Jake Lloyd NOT being up to a challenge like this role (or having good material to work from) and having four separate plots going at the end (Jar Jar and the Gungans fighting Droids, Padme and her group trying to capture the Trade Federation's chancellor, Quigon and Obi-Wan fighting Darth Maul and Anakin and the Naboo pilots fighting the Droid Control Ship and it was a mess)
These are my beliefs, and as such are beyond contestation!
Boffo97 wrote:The questions and the answers are mutually exclusive. If both are known, it's speculated that 1E will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.1E Inventory Spreadsheet
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